Meanwhile, while Macie, Chevron and Kelvin were meaning to pursue the Pursuer—while the Ambassador was being purloined and the actor ants were acting chicken-like, nobody—and I mean nobody—was minding the chickens. I wasn't minding the chickens either, which is how, completely by accident, I accidentally appointed one to be interim Ambassador to Zoic.
It happened like this:
Two hundred and twenty seven seconds ago, there was a tremendous splash. The splash was so tremendous it caught the attention of the Tremendous Tremor Transponders or TTTs as our populous so affectionately calls them. These TTTs, I should tell you, are psycho-electric detectors, about the size of half a pineapple and shaped like one, too. They sit all across the countryside, awaiting the tell-tale signs of a tremendous titanium levitation event. Like the splash of a shallow river lifted out of its riverbed and then crashed back down again. When a TTT detects a tremendous sound like that, it wires a message to the Tremendous Tremor Transponder Transmission Tower, or TTTTT, as our populous not-so-affectionately calls it. Those signals are routed directly to the TTTTT Pursuer Pipeline (Patent Pending), which sends out a TTTTT-PPPP Licensed "Locate and Limit" List to every licensed Pursuer in the area. Their mission: to locate the source of heretofore said tremendous activities, and limit their future activation. That is to say: stop Macie, Chevron, Kelvin and the Ambassador in their tracks by issuing an official TTTTT-PPPP-LLLL warning. Which usually came in the form of a form—pad-sized in triplicate, of course.
Except—except for the TTTTT-PPPP-LLLL Form-Filling Strike. Absolutely no pursuer within a thousand miles will pursue tremendous sounds of any kind. Or—I should correct myself; any pursuer will pursue, but she or he roundly refuses to confront the perpetrator with a filled-out form. What's a pursuit without a filled out form? Well, I'll tell you: not any pursuit I would pursue in Lincylum.
Hence the need for me to step out from behind the Narrative Arc, as it were (a truer ark than any seen since Mt. Ararat). Step out and step into the customary pursuer garb—the garbled jacket, bowler hat, beard and brown boots. To become again a Pursuer, in pursuit of a cause. Until...
Well, until I accidentally appointed Selena Veronica West interim Ambassador to Zoic. In my defense, she was far more intelligent than the current ambassador, and could hold even better conversation. At least once you loosened the molecules a bit, and freed thoughts from words and words from thoughts.
Selina Veronica West said to me—and I'll never forget it—